


admittance

by CHAEXNNIE



Category: Killing Eve (TV 2018)
Genre: "admit it eve you wish i was here", 3x03, 3x03 spoilers, Canon Compliant, F/F, OOC?, because i am not over the kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:53:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23956420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CHAEXNNIE/pseuds/CHAEXNNIE
Summary: eve is left alone with her thoughts and villanelle's words to reflect on what could've been and what she wants.
Relationships: Eve Polastri/Villanelle | Oksana Astankova, past Eve Polastri/Niko Polastri
Comments: 2
Kudos: 25





	admittance

**Author's Note:**

> i've never written for this fandom before so i apologise if eve is OOC. nevertheless, enjoy!

"Admit it Eve, you wish I was here."

Eve stared dumbly at the flashing heart, unable to explain the sudden hammering in her chest. Villanelle had been _here._ In her _home_. Despite all the safety measures she had taken, having learned her lessons from Villanelle's previous drop-ins, she had somehow been found once again.

Her throat clogged as the heart continued to blare its deafening message and all Eve could do was wonder why? Why was Villanelle taunting her in such a cruel manner? Why did Villanelle continue her pursuit despite what had happened in Rome? Why did Eve kiss her? _Why_ wasn't Villanelle the one lying on her bed instead of that stupid pink teddy bear?

"Admit it Eve, you wish I was here."

The kiss. Eve wished she could lie and say that the kiss hadn't been the only thing on her mind ever since she'd gotten off the bus; she also wished she could lie and say that she didn't enjoy it. Kissing Villanelle... it was like nothing she'd ever experienced before.

Niko's kisses were always gentle and warm: nothing extraordinary. Yet when Eve's lips met Villanelle's it was like her whole world was on fire and suddenly Eve felt something that she hadn't experienced in years. She felt wanted.

(Not that Niko had made her feel unwanted, it was just that Villanelle's lips against her own had made her feel like the only thing in the world).

It wasn't even a proper kiss, for God's sake, and Eve was other here acting like a giddy schoolgirl.

"Admit it Eve, you wish I was here."

It definitely wasn't how Eve had imagined their first kiss- _not that she'd imagined them kissing before._ Oh, who was she kidding? Of course she had. She had imagined it back in Villanelle's Paris apartment, but instead of acting on her wants she had pushed them away by plunging a knife deep into Villanelle's stomach.

She had imagined it back in Rome, too. More than once. Especially when she had been listening to Villanelle through the earpiece as the assassin touched herself and gave breathy moans of Eve's name. As Eve had swung her legs over Hugo and taken control all she could imagine was Villanelle in his place, and although Eve had never kissed Hugo during their encounter there was nothing more that she wanted to do than kiss Villanelle in that moment.

She had thought about it once again when she had swung the axe into Raymond's skull in order to save Villanelle in (what Eve had thought to be) her weakest moment. She had been so proud that she had been the one to save Villanelle that she had wanted to be the one to kiss her aswell.

And finally back in the ruins, just before everything went to shit. In those innocent minutes before the shooting Eve would've done _anything_ for Villanelle, including running away with her to Alaska. She had allowed herself to, foolishly, imagine what their life would be like in Alaska.

Normal stuff, like cooking together (even though Eve's cooking skills were definitely not something to be praised). She hoped that Villanelle would teach her how, and perhaps Eve would be more interested in learning from someone that was not Niko.

Villanelle was nothing like Niko.

"Admit it Eve, you wish I was here."

A cool house would be nice. Her house with Niko had been... too big. It was fitting in a way, considering the amount of space that always seemed to be between them. Something quaint would be nice: she wasn't quite sure how Villanelle would take to that suggestion, but Eve hoped they would be able to compromise.

"Admit it Eve, you wish I was here."

As for jobs? Eve liked the action her job brought into her life, but now she thought of it she only really started to like it when Villanelle had shown up. Before that it was dull... boring. Even The Ghost could not compare to the thrill she had experienced when chasing Villanelle, and Eve doubted that anything ever would.

Would she get bored of Villanelle without the constant threat of danger? Would Villanelle get bored of her?

"Admit it Eve, you wish I was here."

She hoped not. Eve wanted to keep the thrill they had at the moment without having to worry about death at any given moment, _or_ about international assassins breaking into her home and leaving behind strange gifts like how dogs mark their territory.

They could watch movies, go on spontaneous dates and trips whenever they felt like it: they certainly would have the money. They could lie together in bed, holding one another close as they finally felt safe to let their guards down again. Like Paris, only this time without the blood and knives.

"Admit it Eve."

Eve raises the heart to her ear slowly, simply relishing in Villanelle's words. She had barely gotten a chance to hear her on the bus, too blinded by her emotions to let Villanelle's thick accent and cocky words consume her like she normally would. 

She no longer asked why she kissed Villanelle. She knew, and that both scared and excited her.

"You wish I was here."

So yeah, Eve admits it. She _really_ fucking wishes Villanelle was here.


End file.
